Monday, February 4, 2008

First Smoke

I was 10 years old I guess, I was in class four and first time got infatuated seeing my grandmother smoking same night I saw Amitabh smoking in Deewar. That was it cigarette was the next thing to try. I was angry I remember, surrounded by stupid people in a small town. Panwalllahs who just wont give you smoke, friends who will lecture you for hours if you ask them to buy it for you. Step further they run back to tell it to dear mummy and soon there is a phone call being made to your mother.
Stupid arrogant people all around. My parents just didn't understand. It was my legacy I had to take it. My mouth...lung it was all waiting for that dense air. I was old enough to make my own decisions. I was going to try it now in a subtle form or later in a dreaded form. My small town folks and their smaller mentality stole my innocence and made me a thief stealing a cigarette from my fathers pack.
Before I could decipher smoke is not blown but taken in from a cigarette I was caught and dragged back home like a serial killer being presented to the law. I got multiple slaps from my mother before she felt her hand is hurting and then I was passed on to my elder brother who relished using me as a punching bag.
Outcast and rebuked I cried at my fate I was so near to grabbing my legacy...
I smoked my first cigarette with one of my cousin sisters and then it was hostel and ahead and smoke never stopped. I lived my legacy never did those evil thought ever crossed my mind to forsake it. I have bunked classes midway to go out and smoke. I have been registered as absconding from hospital beds in thy love of smoke.


Today I am flying back home for minor lung operation. Thrice it has collapsed and now the X-Ray shows infection on both the sides.I will be going to the same small old town where I was denied my legacy to make a promise of being a chain smoker once I am out of operation ward... if not absconding midway...

3 comments:

Anonymous said...

imran tumne ye kun nahi bataya ki tumhara operation hoga?

kitni galat baat hai, allah tumko jaldi se theek kare...Ameen

Anonymous said...

imran??? i thght evry1 calls u ASHRAF smartpants... sounds like a caring one wats cooking...i am jealous

Anonymous said...

Seems like you are talking about life i have lived don't worry you dont know me

i am just a silly lost girl who is going to keep a tag on your blogs now on!!!