Life is a tangent to the curve of our expectations. Curves are what I like, but that's beside the point. Anyways, in this world of curves and dead-ends, the only way to stay on the right tract is to distract.
Till very late to distract myself from whats happening around me I used to sit near my balcony door and count the number of ants walking, giving them names and mission to bring food for the colony. Well, that’s me your very own but truly speaking, the philosophy of distraction is profound, but we will talk about it later. For now I must talk about the apple. The story of the apple is as old as Baba Adam. The apple was the first fruit that the human being tasted( I have not heard anyone eating any other fruit in heaven). That's why they say in English 'A for Apple'. Well, intelligent readers know that after 'A for Apple' comes 'B for Boy', and that was what Baba Adam realized he could produce only after eating the apple. So, the apple is central to human existence. Had there been no apple, perhaps we would not have existed, and my groundbreaking research on the importance of the apple would have never taken place. Perhaps my research could have still occurred, for, habitually I work only in thin air, on non-existent topics, but we can at least for now discount that impossibility.
Speaking about baba Adam and bibi Eve: Soon after eating the tasty apple, baba Adam realized that bibi Eve now “Babe Eve” looked even tastier. So babe Eve, clever that she was, confused baba Adam by cloaking herself in the most distasteful leaves of all: the banana leaf. The first love song was sung around the apple tree, and that forms the inspiration for the zillion Hindi movie songs that are filmed around trees. God saw babe Eve dancing in designer banana fashion wear, and like the censor committee, he too was appalled to the core. He realized that his apple was gone, eaten and that too by baba Adam. God, like me, too likes apples. He was quite annoyed, so much so, that he put an apple in man's throat, and banished him from heaven. It is this very apple that all my classmates looked forward to in high school and Santosh Rai still carries it at the height of 6’5 feet. Only when the apple appeared, one could claim his exalted entry into adulthood. Apple as a synonym of manhood, apple as a synonym of women leading man into his fall or rise, whatever you would like to call it, apple as a synonym of desire: apple is central to the concept that is the human being!
I like apples... its genetic my father loves them more than me; an apple a day keeps the doctor away, though I would urge the unmarried women to keep the apples away, so that they can meet me some day. Only if I meet them, they can make me the apple of their eyes. There are some women who tried to make me the grapes in their eye: some left saying that the grapes are sour; others said they prefer wine, and would return to savor me when I become old and fine. So at least for now I am like the desi satellite, Apple, launched in some year around the period I was born, revolving in space, miles away from the beauties. I keep falling, though I never reach them; if the moon couldn't complete its free fall, how can I. But I do hope that I cause some tides of emotion in those unreachable apple pies. Apple pies are sweet, and sultry and tasty and inviting and no other pies can match them. Not even the American pie, for which Madonna re-sung bye bye Miss American Pie, and two movies came and went, without a real punch; for the real revelation would be a movie I produce some day, aptly titled Apple Pie, starring none other than Preity Zinta who hails from apple valley, from my apple state (though we are not related).
The apple that fell on
We have come a long way from the first day of humanity on this planet to the present moment, and the apple is still there. When people started creating this virtual habitat, they called the computers "Macintosh", another world for apple. I still prefer the apple, but apples are not that easy to get. At least in
Get real. Find your apple today. Or find your Eve who can lead you to the apple. If it is off-season, eat lime chicken at Applebee or get HMPC tonic that has therapeutic powers. Sit under an apple tree -- perhaps some apple will fall on your head someday, and that day you will regain your lost 'yaadash'. Maybe you have had an apple fall on your head in the past, and in that past you were the apple of everyone's eyes. Your reading this far reminds me of another apple story, an unfair conclusion to your swallowing my apple fairytale: one rotten apple spoils the lot! Anyhow, that rotten lot later becomes fine alcohol, as tasty as wine. Wine: reminds me of more grapevine, perhaps I will weave that the next time. Meanwhile, eat an apple a day, and keep the future me (doc) away.