I admit it. I don't carry my weight in the company of Indian men. I don't discuss cricket or burp after gulping beer mugs.
For most men, talking sports is as basic and natural a transaction as watching TV, farting keeping a straight face or going to the toilet. Same way like its mandatory for men to hang out in bar joints and gulp down beer mugs more than they have gulped water in a day, if not on weekdays then at least on weekends. Aah!! take out the religion and allergy… I am not religious and surely not allergic to highs. I am allergic to only humans the closer they resemble me more allergic I am to them; good thing is we are NOT talking about love jerks and drugs for once. Just “New Age Alfa Indian Male” It's a universally understood way for strangers to structure interactions, for friends and family to build bonds in the 21st century over
The extent to which cricket means nothing to me measures my alienation from my gender and my culture, but I can't help it; my favorite Indian cricketer Salil Ankola his face was bearable it just cant be that Adivasi Dhoni. When talk turns to the most fundamental bond of our fraternity, my overwhelming response is tedium. Though friends know this, and usually give me wide berth on cricket discussion, strangers naturally assume I'm wearing a guard on my crotch, that I look like a typical guy in 20’s who knows the score of every match going on, absolutely no hint of disqualification. Especially men who never caught a ball on less than one bounce are no less eager in their sports talk than the most gym-hardened jock. This means I spend a significant part of my life maneuvering around the issue. Going into bars during world cup is asking for it, I never stray there even if there is a free strip tease along with the match. As for that ultimate haven of maleness -- the barbershop -- my first concern is not the hair cutter's skill but his reticence his choices, is he going to listen to music or watch cricket. Even at home I have to hustle, jumping for the remote whenever a coach or player is going through the hundredth iteration of why they won/lost. Usually we don’t win so explanations are more pathetic and longer.
I do resent it, and why not so much of my society's time, money and attention is consumed by something I don't care about. I feel like leaving this god forsaken land for magnolia or
I thank god for the company of women… for their very creation, they are the saner lot when in comes to these stuff…at least till lately. Although it’s highly unlikely females may harbour same taste and preference in life as mine but at least till start of this decade they were sane enough to hate both cricket and beer mugs and then world detoriated. Bitches came out of closet.
I don’t know why I wrote this maybe some weird drawback symptoms and I am sure no one will read it twice.