What is special?? – Part I

I have lately been on my burning the bridges tour… with friends, neighbor’s family… especially the family and people who are usually around me.Hate to believe I have retards in my family line but the numbers just keep on pouring.



My eight-year old nephew hears my fifty eight year old mom asking when I am going to become a father and he starts asking me the same…and its revelation to all. A child prophet directs a question to me and I got to do something now. Can’t even think how to respond to that but everyone else of every shape and size look at me like I am going to giveaway the secret of Bermuda triangle. My silence meant my mother and aunt answer in unison when do you want? Why do you want? Believe me when I say embarrassment is understated under my roof. Anyway, now I have to defy human biology and become a father in 5 months so that this little mutt can have someone to play with. Maybe one day I will cook him and feed him to his parents. Eat your bloody sin…

Human babies are not special…anything which can be created through accidents… time and again can’t be special. I am not special … you are not special no human is.

I will tell you what is special… Magical…but we have a tendency to crib about those stuff. Airplane and Mobile phones are special, Tv and drugs are special. But we whine and criticize.

People on the plane are worst. They are normal usually but its till the time they are standing in the line for security check… that’s the point anyone is ready to be stripped to their birthday suit just to pass the gate to glory. And then they get so uptight. I don’t know why, it’s like the security guy while frisking ticked the timer on their buttocks.
Ooo it was worst day of my life, I was sitting on the runway for 14 minutes… and the rest will go awww someone should do something about these delays…
NO stop complaining… did you ever think what happened after 14 minutes eh? You were sitting on a chair …in the SKY… flying at a height where no bird flew while sipping your free liquor… tended by girl who won’t ever look at you in any other goddamn normal or abnormal circumstances. Gliding in the air and then land soft on giant wheels, which you can’t even conceive how they put air in it. More they travel… more they complain… the first time I traveled air… I puked on the person sitting in front of me with bewilderment… and then flicked my camera clicking till it lasted. Flying in the air when you are not flying that’s special.

Same while using cell phones… aahhh shit I am hearing blank… hell no connectivity… this is stupid phone…
Hold-on… see what you are using… you punch some numbers and then start talking… your words through some godly technology changes from voice to some scientific terms goes to a satellite and gets transmitted to that small device held by you friend in some other part of the world and by the time it reaches him its your voice again. It’s Magic!!! And all happens at the speed, which you can never ever think of.

Got to rush… will catch-up on Tv and Drugs soon