Men are from Mars, Women are from Hell*

*Not all women are from Hell

Men and women have been in an epic battle with each other since the beginning of time or maybe the 2^nd couple after Baba Adam and Bibi Eve. Men wish to subdue the women through peace and noble measures; women wish to crush the men with sheer power. If love is war, then relationships are the front line, on which it is fought, and couples are the soldiers who fight for their gender.

Men and women are similar in several ways. We are both for instance, completely superficial. The difference is that men, are superficial about who the women is, whereas women are superficial, about what the man has. When a man meets a woman he estimates her weight, checks the size of her chest and posterior, and says a prayer to the Lord, hoping she is not completely evil. When a woman meets a man she, estimates the size of his wallet, checks what kind of car he drives and asks him what he does for a living. When pointed out to them the superficiality of the situation a man usually says, "I want to be with a woman who takes care of herself and whose body I find pleasing". This is no doubt a completely superficial statement, however; it is spoken with complete honesty and truth. When the same thing was showed to a woman she said, "I want a man who will be able to support my children, I think nothing of my self, only of my future family". This makes her superficial requirements not at all superficial; on the other hand, it is highly unlikely that she is only thinking of her future when the woman checks all of these aspects. Thus where men fight their battles directly and accept the consequences of such an approach, women are sneaky and avoid directly stating what they want to say. They are the masters of emotional slaughters.

An interesting statistic is that if a man and a woman are together for over fifty years and the woman passes way the man will also die within five years. Compare that situation to if a couple is together for an equal amount of time and the man dies, the woman will most likely re-marry within five years. This proves that the man's approach to choosing a suitor leads to feelings of true love, where as the woman's criteria leads to an easy re-pick. This means that each woman could be potentially capable of subduing two or more men to her will. The ability to create multiple casualties is a valuable weapon in the art of war.

The battle of the sexes begins at the very first date. Each party enters into the arena with separate goals. The man's goal, is to find out weather or not this particular women, is evil because not all women are evil. He does this through a simple test of her integrity. During the date, the man suitor will attempt to get as far into a sexual relationship with the girl as humanly possible. If she refuses him anything but a hug, or possibly a kiss goodbye, he sees her as a woman of high integrity and is interested in her. If she allows him more entrance then a kiss, then he is interested in her for a different set of reasons.

A women's goal going into the relationship, assuming she is of the evil variety, is to take control of this male. If he meets up with the requirements stated earlier then she will latch onto him, teasing him, until she has complete control of his mind, and all of his thoughts are of her. She will then consider him for a "long term relationship" or "enslavement" as it is called in the inner circles of women.

Take care that when are dating a woman, that she is not of the evil variety, there are many woman out there who are kind and nice, and good partners to settle down with. Unfortunately for men, it is impossible to tell the difference between the two. This is because of an evolved ability to not comprehend anything about women, evil or not, originally intended as a form of self defense.

There are bad guys out there as well but that’s a different story and a different Blog.